57. Learnin' to Write Right, Mostly at Night

The Case of the Sketching Scriptologist

Hello, friend - hope you’ve had a great week!

Little bit of housekeeping before we kick off. You might notice an ‘Article Voiceover’ banner thing at the top of this post. You might even be listening to it right now! If you click on the recording, you can hear my dulcet tones read this junk out to you! It’s the audiobook you never asked for! Take that, eyes!

Up to you - I’m just giving it a try. Apologies for the bits where I’m breathing and making clicking sounds like a lizard. Count how many times I say ‘anyway’!

Let me know if the voicey bit is a good addition or not. I try and record in one take due to my lack of patience and editing skills, so I make some weird mostly-unintentional noises which you can enjoy for free.

On with our regularly scheduled Jennifer.

Prince Toady and Lady Frogface share a lovely evening on the balcony, reminiscing on the days when they weren't part amphibian - but agreeing that it is nice to now be able to eat flies.

I’ve been feeling both creative and in the mood to shake things up a bit lately - which probably means I need a nap. Does anyone else begrudge naps? I used to loooove sleeping in and taking siestas during the day, but now I find it hard to reconcile the loss of time that I’d have to exchange for a ticket to snooze town.

These days I’d rather just get overtired and release my nonsense in posts like these, or via mouth to ear if you know me in real life. Ok, that sounds weird. Spoiler alert - I’m tired right now. And no I won’t nap, don’t make me come over there.

Oooh! While I wasn’t sleeping, someone bought a sticker of Slow Greg over on my Redbubble site! I earned $1.85 which I immediately spent at our local secondhand bookshop. Slow Greg has to sell a bit more of himself to cover my purchase, but he’s good for it.

Crime readers - let me know if you’ve read any of these: ‘A Hole in the Ground’ by Andrew Garve; ‘Say It With Poison’ by Ann Granger; ‘The Deep’ by Mickey Spillane; ‘Goldilocks’ by Ed McBain; ‘The Monkey’s Raincoat’ by Robert Crais.

If you’re as impatient as I am for Slow Greg to earn his keep, you can flick me a few book bucks by clicking the ‘Shout me a Coffee’ button below. Thanks, bud x

Fishbird Catch of the Week

I publish a Saturday post on the Fishbird Central website in the form of an art nugget. Everyone loves nuggets! This week’s nugs included:

• Art in June - Week 3, 2025!

  • In this post we throw some creative writing at the dart board easel of life and see what sticks in our literary gullets. I’ve really been leaning into the continuous line drawing lately. Like a limerick? Stilton J Fox has you covered - but don't get too attached to him. There's also a poem with numbers for the mathletes, and a little haiku for lovers of Clarkson's Farm.

There’s a little linky-link here: Art in June - Week 3, 2025!

For those that can’t be clicked to click away - here are 3 of the 7 to wet your whistle:

I’m Going to Write A Really Bad Book

Promise. I’ve started and it’s going to be the worst. There’s going to be plot holes and every colour herring under the literary rainbow. I’m going to channel every writer that I’ve ever admired and even ones I don’t - I’ll listen to them carefully, and then probably do the exact opposite of what they suggest.

I have had some false starts before - so fair play if you’re rolling your eyes right now. But this time I’ve stuck a timetable to the fridge with some regular writing time carved out during the week - while still leaving time for work, art, newsletter and website stuff. So far it’s going swimmingly and I can’t ever see a time where the wheels will fall off .. *pauses for sound of falling wheels*.

All you aspiring or published writers out there - are you a plotter or a pantser? I’m a plotter, and currently building an outline to stuff my characters into. Mostly I’m laughing at my own jokes - no-one checks! Any tips or tricks along the way are greatly appreciated. I’ll keep you all updated as I progress, and please - feel free to keep me accountable by raising it in polite conversation.

Look at all these books I have that can teach me to write while I avoid writing the thing!: ‘Save the Cat Writes a Novel’ by Jessica Brody; ‘The Writing Book’ by Kate Grenville; ‘Consider This’ by Chuck Palahniuk; ‘Story Genius’ by Lisa Cron; ‘Writing Tools’ by Roy Peter Clark; Stephen King’s ‘On Writing’; ‘How to be a Writer’ by John Birmingham; and ‘Letters to a Young Writer’ by Colum McCann.

Know of anything else that will help me write an awful first draft? Help a Jenny out in the comments.

Quick Fire Wrap Up

Currently Reading: ‘London Rules’ by Mick Herron. This is Book 5 in the ‘Slough House’ series. Over at Slough House, the last stop for washed up spies, the crew are struggling with personal problems: repressed grief, various addictions, retail paralysis, and the nagging suspicion that their newest colleague is a psychopath. But collectively, they're about to rediscover their greatest strength - making a bad situation much, much worse.

Currently Watching: ‘Bodies’ on Netflix. This is a 2023 miniseries about 4 detectives, living in different eras -1890, 1941, 2023 and 2053 - who find the body of the same murder victim in Whitechapel. They soon come to realise their investigations have them central to a conspiracy spanning over 150 years.

Currently Singing Along To: Sooo many things lol. If I can do something obsessively, I generally will. This week, I can’t settle on just one so have added 3 new tunes to the Fishbird Central Spotify Playlist - ‘Deep Stays Down’ by Larkin Poe; ‘Something’s Gotta Give’ by Sammy Davis Jr; and ‘Shorty’s Got to Go’ by Lucky Millinder.

Wishes for the Week

This week I wanted to say a huge thank you to every single one of you that take the time to like, comment, read, share and support all the weird things I do. I think you know that it makes a difference, but you don’t see every crazy grin or flip of my heart when I get your positive metaphorical fist-bumps.

… I really hope you don’t see that heart thing - seems very unscientific.

There aren’t enough words in the well (thanks for nothing Shakespeare) to express how much it means to me (you’re the it). Don’t get weird about it, but you’re even better than Shakespeare. And you can tell him I said that.

Stay cool, punks.

‘She writes like she talks. With a giggle and a side of fries.’ - Garry Disher (probably)

Jen x